from AllAboutGod.com
( First and foremost I am a husband and although I have been on this role for more than 13 years now, sometimes I do have shortcomings and questions on what am I really supposed to do or be to become the Best Husband for My Loving Wife thus lead me to this article that for me is very good resource because it refers to the bible for answers. To your success and be the Best Husband You can Be! Let's enjoy the journey! )
Role of the Husband in
the Bible – Leader
The role of the husband in the Bible starts with leadership. Scripture makes it
very clear that a husband must be a leader of his home and have healthy control
of his life. 1 Timothy 3, in speaking of two church leadership
positions traditionally filled by men, teaches that an Overseer and Deacon must
manage their family well. Verse 5 specifically says, “If anyone does not know
how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?”
Furthering this understanding, Ephesians 5:21-24 says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of
the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the
Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to
their husbands in everything.” Again, in 1 Corinthians 11:3, Scripture says, "But I want you to realize that the head
of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ
is God.”
One of the primary roles of a husband in the Bible, then, is to lead.
Leadership simply means influence. Therefore, a biblically-based husband should
influence his family. Husbands are not dictators, they should not demand, they
should not rule over their wives. Instead, husbands should influence their
wives and families in accordance with biblical teaching. They should exemplify,
with their voice and their actions, attributes that bring glory to God and
value to their spouse and family. The fruit of a good biblically-based husband
is a strong, confident, spiritually mature wife and family.
Two very specific ways a husband influences his home is through his provision
and protection.
Role of the Husband in
the Bible – Provider and Protector
The role of the husband in the Bible starts with leadership, but encompasses
provision and protection. A husband will never influence his wife if he does
not care for her. He can demand and she may follow as a result, but he will
never truly have her heart unless he provides for her needs, cares for her
wellbeing, and protects her both physically and spiritually. For as Scripture
says:
"Anyone who does not provide for their
relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is
worse than an unbeliever” (1
Timothy 5:8).
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them” (Colossians 3:19).
“Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and
treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the
gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers” (1 Peter 3:7).
God loves His
daughters and the children they bear. When He gives one of His daughters to a
man, He desires that the man cares for her. In no place does Scripture teach or
endorse that women and children be considered second rate or inferior to men.
Instead, He finds them so precious that He asks for special care to be given
them; a care that only biblically-based men can provide. Women are very capable
of taking care of themselves. However, God did make men and women different and
thus due to the physical nature and strength God gave men, He has charged them
with the provision and protection of their families.
The physical nature and strength of a man is to be managed with grace and
gentleness. God did not create men to lord over women nor did he create women
to simply wait on men. He made them both to complement each other through
healthy companionship.
Role of the Husband in
the Bible – Companion
The role of the husband in the Bible is fulfilled through the heart of
companionship. Ephesians 5:25-33 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just
as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy,
cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to
himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but
holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as
their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever
hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the
church—for we are members of his body. ‘For this reason a man will leave his
father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one
flesh.’ This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the
church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself,
and the wife must respect her husband.”
The relationship between a husband and a wife is meant to be one of love,
respect, and support. They are to help each other. This idea is introduced at
the beginning of the Bible in the story of the creation of Eve. Adam needed a
companion, a suitable helper, yet one could not be found until God created
Eve. Genesis 2:20-24 says, “…But for Adam no suitable helper
was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while
he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place
with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the
man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called “woman,” for she was taken out of
man.’ That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife,
and they become one flesh.”
This also leads to another understanding of companionship. God created men and
women with natural, physical, and emotional differences. Usually where one is
weak, the other is strong. Therefore, a husband and wife can help each other by
meeting the other person’s needs through physical and emotional intimacy. 1 Corinthians 7:2-5 addresses this, “But since sexual
immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own
wife, and each woman with her own husband. The husband should fulfill his
marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does
not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same
way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his
wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a
time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so
that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” When the
needs of our spouse are properly met through healthy companionship, the two can
help each other and can live a successful life together.
Lastly, through their companionship a husband and wife work together as a team
to develop and grow a family. God’s plan was that every home operate under the
specific roles of both a husband and a wife and that through this they raise
healthy children who honor God with their lives.Ephesians 6:1-3 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this
is right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ —which is the first commandment with a
promise— ‘so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on
the earth.’” Children are blessed through the honor of their mother and father
working in unison to train them up in the way they should go.
The companionship between a man and a woman is directed by the influence of the
husband through his provision and protection and is covered by his caring,
gentle, and graceful love for his wife and family. Without the biblical roles
of a husband being fulfilled by a strong man of God, the family unit risks the
difficulties brought on by sin and spiritual distortion. Satan desires the
destruction of the family, but through Christ and proper understanding of
biblical roles, the family is a strong and safe place to grow in God.
